"Living With Borderline Personality Disorder"
Just like I did with other articles or whatever, I will copy some paragraphs that best describe the way I feel (either sometimes or most of the times). This time, though, I would copy the freaking percent of 70-80. I can relate to it this much...
"Before, I simply thought I was overly emotional, often susceptible to intense mood swings and that something was intrinsically wrong with me. Was I depressed? I couldn’t be. I’ve had moments when I was the happiest person in the world."
"I told my mum when I was in high school, “I think I have bipolar” and she said “You only have bipolar if you think you have bipolar”. So I told myself I wasn’t bipolar, but still, I felt as though there was something very empty and sad about me."
"So, in a nutshell, it’s a tumultuous and emotional rollercoaster of contradictions. The worst part is that the symptoms feed on themselves and snowball until you’re buried under an avalanche. And it sucks. Not only for me, but also for those closest to me."
"I became infatuated with other boys. Funny, how hypocrisy works. Funny, how I was afraid of being abandoned and yet I was the one who did the abandoning. My little flings with other guys did not last very long. The same thing kept happening- I would be afraid that I wasn’t good enough, that I wasn’t the girl they wanted and that they would leave. So I always left first, or I would give them the option to leave and it left me feeling even worse and alone."
"At that point we just both assumed I was a girl with “girl problems”, but neither of us realised that I’m a mental fuck-up."
"But now I think back to my past and it all becomes so clear to me. All the signs were there but I just assumed I was a ‘normal’ girl who sometimes became way too emotional for her own good."
If you think you are alone in this kind of disorder, please read the entire article here. And convince yourself that you are not. :)
"Before, I simply thought I was overly emotional, often susceptible to intense mood swings and that something was intrinsically wrong with me. Was I depressed? I couldn’t be. I’ve had moments when I was the happiest person in the world."
"I told my mum when I was in high school, “I think I have bipolar” and she said “You only have bipolar if you think you have bipolar”. So I told myself I wasn’t bipolar, but still, I felt as though there was something very empty and sad about me."
"So, in a nutshell, it’s a tumultuous and emotional rollercoaster of contradictions. The worst part is that the symptoms feed on themselves and snowball until you’re buried under an avalanche. And it sucks. Not only for me, but also for those closest to me."
"I became infatuated with other boys. Funny, how hypocrisy works. Funny, how I was afraid of being abandoned and yet I was the one who did the abandoning. My little flings with other guys did not last very long. The same thing kept happening- I would be afraid that I wasn’t good enough, that I wasn’t the girl they wanted and that they would leave. So I always left first, or I would give them the option to leave and it left me feeling even worse and alone."
"At that point we just both assumed I was a girl with “girl problems”, but neither of us realised that I’m a mental fuck-up."
"But now I think back to my past and it all becomes so clear to me. All the signs were there but I just assumed I was a ‘normal’ girl who sometimes became way too emotional for her own good."
If you think you are alone in this kind of disorder, please read the entire article here. And convince yourself that you are not. :)
Hi Bianca, because you're dealing with roller coaster rides of infatuation and loneliness, I think you'd really enjoy my novel "The Year of Yearning," especially if you're looking for a happy ending! (Presuming your happy ending involves falling in love with someone who understands you.) You can find my book on my blog, as well as poetry and posts about love.
RăspundețiȘtergereBest regards, Jeff