Homesick? Not even close. :)

It was a gloomy, overcast, usual winter day. I let my mind wander, as I often do when I have assignments to complete. Staring out my room's window.

A song I used to listen to back in Romania came on the playlist; then another one and another one. Those types of songs that are filled up with memories, and that send you back in the past. A familiar smell came from the freshly brewed tea, which threw me in the same past. I noticed I stay in the same position in my desk chair, with the palms between my thighs, as I usually stayed when I had homework to do, back then. Everything was linked to the past, and everything was meant to trigger homesickness. But they didn't.

I felt emptiness in my stomach. But it was good. As all my senses were aroused and sharpened. Past memories came back to life, past feelings, past thoughts...all the stimuli threw me completely back there; it's not the first time. 

But it is the first time when I'm happy I recall them. It's the first time when I'm not sorry they came back to life; and when I am not sad to leave them behind, where they belong.

However, now I'm moving on. By feeling the past running through my veins again, I truly realized where I am now. I am really anchored in the present and I acknowledge my opportunities. I have lived in the past enough: once in itself, and many times dragged there by even the smallest familiar sensation.

But now, the only place I want to live in is the present. The name itself tells why. I finally learned that living in another time is pointless; it took me 19 years and 2 countries.

It was suddenly sunny in my room.