"And some stardust on my footprints..."

"I'm still thinking about him. There are 3 and a half years since what happened, but still he's the one taking the most space in my mind and in my heart. And once he told me "I hope I'm not taking much space". Heh.

I'm wondering why. Why is he still there. I tried to forget him. God, how much I tried...

I am simply not able to forget what has happened and what have I felt. How deep and how turbulent. And, more than anything, how warm and cozy. And how infinite...

I don't even want to ask him what he now believes about back then, what he recalls, if it actually meant something to him. I'm afraid I will hate him.

I'm waiting for a hint that might help me understand what's going on, because I feel like I don't want to forget. A story. A song. A line. Or someone like me...

It happened to me to be attracted by others. But as long as he was there, and even months after, I couldn't get close to anyone else.

He, it's like he draws me towards him like a magnet. Insisting and insisting. I'm so weak in front of love.

They say that the soul knows its way to healing; the key is to silence the mind. I still want to ask him those questions. For the sake of those beautiful times, for the sake of me moving on and falling in love again; of freely leaving, of feeling I'm alive.

I hope that the relocation, Breda, the studies will help me get over these faster.

"And stardust on my footprints..."
"Honey, we are walking on a wire..." "

Originally written: Dec 2014 - Feb 2015